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Archives for June 2020

Hold ‘Em

June 24, 2020 By admin

In a recent survey about how millennials and boomers relate to each other in the workplace, it won’t surprise you to learn that there’s just a little bit of friction there.

Millennials make up more of the workforce than any other generation, so it must be just a tad frustrating to have all of us baby boomers in their way. Thirty percent of the millennials surveyed indicated that older workers were holding them back from advancing. A quarter of them went so far as to quit because of a boomer manager or colleague. That’s going full OK, Boomer!

But here’s the flip side to that statistic. Thirty-six percent of boomers said they quit because of a millennial boss or supervisor and more than half say they experienced age discrimination.

Some of the findings are so predictable yet illuminating. We know that the generations have different work styles, but it’s still amusing that almost half the boomers are annoyed by the way millennials are always using their smart phones. Thirty-five percent think millennials are lazy and 41% think millennials act too entitled.

Meanwhile, 52% of millennials think boomers are know-it-alls, 47% think they act too entitled and 34% are annoyed by their egos.

Apparently, it’s not all petty grievances at work. Forty-two percent of millennials thought their boomer colleagues were dependable, 41% said they were punctual, and 26% said they had a good eye for detail. Boomers acknowledged that millennials could be positive (34%) and good problem solvers (32%).

One of the most divergent findings was how each generation viewed their employers. Sixty percent of boomers felt that their employer was loyal to them, while only 40% of millennials believed that to be true.

How loyal? Not that much really. If offered more money, 84% of millennials and 75% of boomers would split in a heartbeat.

Will millennials miss us when we’re gone? Hard to say. That question was not in the survey. I would like to think they will miss our steady and dependable work ethic, but it might just be a case where what they really want to know is “Where the hell is the key to the third floor mens room?”

Jay Harrison is a graphic designer and writer whose work can be seen at DesignConcept. His mystery novel, Head Above Water, is available on Amazon and Kindle. You can also visit his author page here.

Filed Under: ESSAY

Plain Ride

June 24, 2020 By admin

One of the principals at the architect’s office was also a licensed pilot. She insisted that an up-and-comer like me would do well to follow her example and learn to fly an airplane. My boss pointed out that I would then be able to travel to remote jobsites, meet with clients or contactors at the airport and return home in time for dinner.

I didn’t say so out loud, but I was reminded of the Texan who showed up at the Emergency Room with his entire body covered in puncture wounds.

“What happened to you?” the intern asked.

“Oh I had a little accident,” came the reply.

“I can see that, Mr. Melton, but how in the world did you get all these stabs?”

“Well, I’ll tell you, Doc. Me and Junior was out in the brush doing a little cactus jumping.”

“How’s that? You were cactus jumping?”

“Yeah, I know what you are probably thinking, but I tell you it seemed like a good idea at the time.”

I signed up for flying lessons with some reservations. The first day my instructor took me up in a single-engine, fixed wing with tandem seats. I learned a whole lot during the short flight over Albuquerque. I had been watching the small planes seem to float among the clouds and pictured myself at the controls, at one with the eagles.

“Ready to fly?” the pilot asked.

I nodded, climbed inside and strapped in for the adventure ahead. My enthusiasm was guarded, yet real, but my expectations were way out of line. The first indication that reason had failed me was the noise, louder than a tractor or a motorcycle, or maybe a tank. It was loud, and rough, shake-your-guts rough. I flashed back to an experience on a roller coaster at the state fair, holding on with white knuckles and a growing sensation that I might vomit before the ride was over. I imagined what it must be like to operate a jackhammer.

The landing felt like something that was supposed to happen on a trampoline.

“Sorry about that,” the instructor said. “It’s a little windy here this afternoon.”

“No problem,” I lied. My relief in being alive on Earth made it a genuine pleasure to hand over money and understand that I was buying the freedom to never again repeat the experience. Flying is for the birds.

Harpeth Rivers is a writer, musician, and happy homeowner still living and working in New Mexico. Check out his latest book, Proof, An Illustrated Fable on Amazon.

 

Filed Under: ESSAY

The Trip

June 24, 2020 By admin

In a sargassan depth, the selective memories of travel’s discomforts cease to bubble and quietly sink to the mud opening the mind to the pleasures of the new, the discoveries, the escape. Planning the excitements for a body in motion (the savannas of Florida once left safely behind) and seeing hills become mountains, regales with small thrills.

Trip plans will accommodate the serendipitous, leaving room for discovery (and the search for a good carrot cake.) What hints does the map produce? What confirmations does the super brain, Google, provide? Planning travel reveals a world of possibilities and delivers that carefree feeling of anticipation of things wonderful, like having a lottery ticket before the drawing.
Every state a kingdom with its own customs and I, Marco Polo, will attempt to bring back rare chilies from the west, traveling from grits to salsa to grits.

It all sounds like great fun but I’m afraid we must recover the selective memories of the discomforts of travel from the bottom of the Sargasso Sea.

Our skins will contract and shiver when confronted with non-Florida weather and demand a proper covering. We’ll pass through heavy rains where there was drought and fires where there were heavy rains searching longingly for the habitable provinces. Einstein would marvel at the warping of time while trying to cross Texas and the rearranging of molecules in the body trying to get accustomed to such a different diet.

Reconciling the pleasures with the discomforts, knowing that smiling for hoteliers and patiently watching them fumble with registration and not having the room key work at first and getting moved in and ready for lunch at 3PM and finding the restaurant closes at 2PM and, as in all hotels, finding Flamenco dancers practicing in the room above yours is just the sub motif of a wonderful vacation. Freeze that smile, it helps. Memorize the discomforts beforehand to eliminate the element of surprise and rob them of their weight. Admit the discomforts but keep the pleasures hypothetical. They will seem more profound when they appear. If you know your pleasures beforehand they will be diminished. Try foods you’ve never had before; take side trips (the road less traveled) from the main route. Often, memories are created once you get lost. You’ll be interacting with your journey!

Frank DiGangi is from Hawthorne, FL

 

Filed Under: TRAVEL

Mere Mortals

June 3, 2020 By admin

Boomers have gone from tinkering with their bucket list plans to pondering whether or not they will kick the bucket all together.

What a difference a few months make. The camping trip is off. The summer beach booking is in jeopardy. The trip to deliver a loved one’s ashes cannot be taken. You cannot proudly watch the daughter’s graduation. A lot has changed.

Maybe a vaccine next year will get us back on track, and yet, it’s a year lost while many boomers are wondering how many years they have left.

Are boomers better off than younger citizens who depend upon jobs and income to keep a roof over their heads and food in the pantry? Absolutely yes. It’s the reason so many boomers are donating to food banks and urging their representatives to vote yes on legislation to help those thrown out of work.

Still, we can’t help thinking we’re just one missed handwashing or sanitized countertop away from buying the farm. When you’re on the downside of the teeter board, it’s natural to see the lost time as a true loss. It’s also a reminder that mortality is a lot more than some hypothetical event in our future.

And what if some of the futurists are correct that the pandemic, this one or the next one, makes the risk of illness a constant in our lives. Are we ready to live with reduced mobility and socialization as a constant? Should we take our chances and get the virus so we can move on? Is that really possible when some experts are unwilling to predict that those who get the virus will not get it again?

No wonder everyone is experiencing more anxiety. We cannot predict or plan for what’s ahead at exactly the moment in time that we hoped we would be living the good life. It might be time to lower our expectations for how we define the “good life.” Or we could roll the dice and go for it like there’s no tomorrow, because there may not be one. I don’t appreciate Mr. Hobson, but he’s left us his choice.

Jay Harrison is a graphic designer and writer whose work can be seen at DesignConcept. His mystery novel, Head Above Water, is available on Amazon and Kindle. You can also visit his author page here.

Filed Under: ESSAY

Flaky

June 3, 2020 By admin

SPOILER ALERT: You may never eat Corn Flakes again!

Wheaties is known as “The Breakfast of Champions.” Lucky Charms is supposedly “magically delicious.” And then there’s Trix cereal’s slogan, “Silly Rabbit. Trix are for kids.” Good thing they didn’t use the scientific name for rabbits. “Silly Oryctolagus cuniculus. Trix are for kids!”

But if John Harvey Kellogg had to choose a slogan when he invented Corn Flakes in 1894, there’s a good chance he might have chosen:

“Wanna have sex tonight?”   “No thanks. I’m having Corn Flakes.”

At the time he invented Corn Flakes, John Harvey Kellogg was an accomplished doctor, inventor, author, nutritional expert, health advocate and businessman (All good, so far.). But he also was an anti-masturbation activist.

Kellogg’s Corn Flakes was invented, by accident when John Harvey Kellogg left cooked wheat on the stove.

Now you might think this is a joke. It’s not. The inventor of the world’s most famous breakfast cereal, John Harvey Kellogg, was a devout member of the Seventh Day Adventists Church and he believed that “sexual intimacy belongs only within the marital relationship.”

Kellogg’s Corn Flakes was invented to curb the passions of having sex. Even if you were alone!

So, he invented Kellogg’s Corn Flakes to curb sexual impulses and suppress the passion of that generation. John Harvey Kellogg believed sex and half-sex were unhealthy and abnormal. And he thought that meat and spicy food increased sexual desire, but that passion could be lessened by eating a tasteless food for breakfast. Wow. He could have invented Pop Tarts.

Now that you know the Shocking Truth behind Kellogg’s Corn Flakes, what are you going to have for breakfast tomorrow? Me, I’m having Komodo Dragon Chili and Five alarm-Carolina Reaper. They’re important parts of a balanced breakfast.

Jack Goldenberg is way more than a proficient copywriter. He is also the creative director at Einstein da Vinci & Goldenberg and you can get in touch with his inner adman at 10 Minutes of Brilliance.

 

Filed Under: ESSAY

Why Write?

June 3, 2020 By admin

Ann Pattchett’s Bookstore asks, ‘why write?’ when there are so many great writers out there.

It’s in Nashville. Ann Patchett’s bookstore. And as if there isn’t enough music on every corner and bar to grab you by the ears, inside the bookstore there is a recital in progress with a series of singers performing their party pieces to polite applause. More overwhelming than yet more music is the sheer number of books, books, books. The store has half a wall dedicated to Ann’s works alone. Rows of her paperbacks and hardcovers grouped by subtle colors and size are surrounded in turn by Clancy’s and Grisham’s and Patterson’s garish, grinning teeth begging for extraction.

I wonder why I should try to write when there are already so many words and sentences and pages and books to hand. I had just seen a sign down the road—WE BUY BOOKS. Books deftly crafted of stanzas and theses and similes and tropes treated like so much unwanted jewelry for WE BUY GOLD purveyors.

A writing student, after hearing an essay rife with metaphors, asked, “Why do we needs all those riddles?” Good question. Riddles and puzzles—who killed whom in the kitchen with what? What can I possibly add to that looming avalanche of plots and outlines, research and drama that would be new or interesting or insightful? Especially when there are so many superb writers, elegant wordsmiths, more sensitive and insightful than I.

I feel like the guy huddled in a doorway on Nashville’s Broad Street, tapping rhythms on his knee, begging for attention, his hat on the sidewalk for offerings to his minor skills while two doors down, full-fledged musicians play amplified country western with drums, guitars and fiddle behind three-part harmony. And just around the next corner are the recording studios for the actual name artists making CDs to sell after road shows and guest appearances.

I guess it’s all a matter of scale…so to speak. Just because a kid will never be a concert pianist is no reason to give up piano lessons. It’s the moment of creativity that makes it all worthwhile. The Rumpelstiltskin moment of making gold from straw when we suddenly connect unlike or unexpected thoughts and images into something new and original. That’s what makes writing worthwhile, if only for ourselves. As if that’s not enough.

Retired trainer, and writing instructor, Joe Novara and his wife live in Kalamazoo, Michigan. Writings include novels, short stories, a memoir and various poems, plays, anthologies and articles. Read more at https://freefloatingstories.wordpress.com/

 

Filed Under: ESSAY

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